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Short, yes. Sweet, no.

by Adrien-Luc Sanders

For decades, the Iowa caucus has been a significant indicator of which potential candidates would be nominated to run on each party platform in the U.S. presidential race. While the caucus doesn’t forecast the outcome 100% of the time, the results have been consistent enough for the event to draw a great deal of media attention as well as interest from concerned voters.

The results are in from yesterday’s Iowa caucus. The winners, from the Democratic and Republican sides of the fence?

Barack “I have no idea what I’m talking about” Obama and Mike “women should submit and gays are going to hell” Huckabee.

Aw, f***.

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14 Responses to “Short, yes. Sweet, no.”

  1. Kujo Hikaru Says:

    It’s wrong how much you can make me laugh this early in the morning.

    Yeah…can I switch parties, now? I don’t expect much better from Illinois….

  2. Del Says:

    Not sure how much you’re into comics, but you might want to read Warren Ellis’ “Transmetropolitan” series.
    If nothing else, at least it’ll make these guys seem like a slightly better option.

  3. Adrien-Luc Sanders Says:

    ~raises a brow~ So you’re going to start sampling the Democratic cookies now, Hikaru?

    And Del, I may check that out. I do collect some comics. I think there are a few readers who are more into it and who might be interested, though.

  4. Kujo Hikaru Says:

    Pfft, cookies…from the people who invented pork-barrel spending…cookies deep fried in fatback don’t sound appealing. Too much saturated fat and empty calories.

  5. Lyndsey Says:

    I literally snorted I was laughing so hard when I read this. When it comes down to it, if these to numbheads are who we have to choose from, I’d rather vote for the first Black president (even if he has no clue) than vote for another religious wielding fool who probably has the ten commandments posted on his refrigerator. I heart Huckabee? I think not.

  6. Shirvona Says:

    What is a caucus? The newspaper attempted to explain it to me a few days ago and I failed to understand it.
    Bad luck with the results, whatever it is.

  7. Adrien-Luc Sanders Says:

    Hikaru: Gee, showing your bias much? ~snrks~

    Lyndsey:
    Like I always say, lesser of two evils. As an ethnic minority, though, I hate having to vote for the man who could be the first black president only to have him screw things up so badly that half the country says “this is why we don’t elect them colored people!” before going back to boinking their cousins. He won’t screw up as badly as Huckabee, but still…I fear Obama’s ineffectiveness as a president.

    For Shirvona:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Caucus#Caucuses_in_the_United_States

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iowa_Caucus

  8. Indikaze Says:

    Bah, you and I both know that the cousin-boinkers would think as they would even if Obama single-handedly cured world hunger and launched humanity into a thousand-year era of peace.

  9. Kujo Hikaru Says:

    Always shows. Remember, I have the (apparently) invisible tattoo on my forehead that says “Republican”. Is it bad that I’d vote for a remarkably unintelligent dog before Huckabee?

  10. Tone Says:

    I think you’re underestimating Obama a bit for his youth and idealism. Or I may be a bit biased by the fact that “Students for Barack Obama” is the biggest club on my school campus..

    Though, if the country chooses a guy who doesn’t believe in evolution as the next president, that may just be the push I need to move to Canada.

  11. Adrien-Luc Sanders Says:

    That would be assuming that I’m criticizing Obama for his youth and idealism, Tone, and I have other reasons for not being particularly enthusiastic about him as a candidate. Youth doesn’t bother me. His idealism wouldn’t be a problem if he had more to back it up, but from what I’ve seen, he doesn’t. That’s only the start of it, but I’m not going to deluge you with why I wouldn’t vote for Obama unless he was the only choice I could stomach (and if the caucus is an accurate forecast, well…I’d pick Obama over Huckabee - or as Anna cleverly said, “What the Fuckabee”). I could say the same for all of the key contenders for the Democratic vote, and to be fair I’d have to write a dissertation on just why each one leaves me distinctly uncomfortable with the prospect of them at the reins of the presidency.

    There isn’t a single potential candidate on either side that doesn’t make my skin crawl with the idea of the mess they’d make trying to untangle the mess we’re already in.

  12. Tone Says:

    Forgive my assumption, then. Youth and idealism are the most common areas of judgment with Obama that I’ve heard.

    Any president we elect would fuck things up, though. With the mess the US is in, there is no clear cut solution that will magically make everything okay. Our option isn’t, “Who’s going to make everything right again,” but rather, “Who’s going to start us on the right path here.”

    Obama is capable enough of that. Maybe not as capable as Clinton, even if they’re both fighting over the same solutions to the same issues. But he’s capable enough.

  13. Adrien-Luc Sanders Says:

    That’s your opinion, and we’re all entitled, naturally. I’m less concerned with “who’s going to make it right” and more concerned with “who’s going to start stabilizing things without making it worse.” Frankly, I don’t think Obama’s the man for the job. He’s got some great ideas (and some not-so-great ones), but he has a tendency to overlook key things that have already alienated some voters who would otherwise support him, and that could lead to a distressing trend when dealing with major issues. I also worry about his implementation strategy, and just how he plans to accomplish his goals - though I have that same concern with Hillary Clinton.

  14. Shirvona Says:

    Thank you.

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About Darkside Rainbow

DarksideRainbow.net is 451 Press's look at the darker side of the rainbow - where gay life takes a decided turn away from the happy, the shiny, and the pink, complete with news, gossip, and a healthy dose of caffeine-fueled cynicism from gay blogger Adrien-Luc Sanders. Check in Monday through Friday for a decidedly tongue-in-cheek slant on current events in the GLBTQ world, spiced with a few fun rants.

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