Coming to America
Yes, I had to use the title of that cracked-out old Eddie Murphy film from the 80s (lord, did people really dress that way back then? I’m too young to remember). While today’s topic isn’t exactly about Prince Akeem and his slapstick hijinks in an attempt to find love, it does focus on bridging relationship gaps for gay and lesbian partners separated by immigration laws.
Nadler Reintroduces Bill to Unite Gay, Bi-National Couples - The New York Blade
Members of Congress this week reintroduced the Uniting American Families Act, or UAFA, a measure that would allow gay Americans to sponsor a foreign-born “permanent partner” for U.S. residency.
Rep. Jerrold Nadler (D-N.Y.), the bill’s lead sponsor in the House, said the measure would grant gay couples the same rights and opportunities that straight couples enjoy.
…except the right to marry, the right to tax benefits, the right to be included on your partner’s insurance, the right to hospital visitation, and don’t get me started on matters of estate in the event of a partner’s death.
Don’t get me wrong: I think this is an admirable idea, and just a few months ago I’d have had a personal investment in the issue, as my last boyfriend lived in the UK and we were having serious issues regarding how to handle the possibility of permanently settling down together. (You can see where that ended up, hello happily single Adri.)
I think it takes a lot of courage and, to be frank, balls to introduce this kind of legislation considering the current outright war between pro-gay and anti-gay activists regarding gay rights and freedoms. Not only does it focus on gay rights, but even if immigrants are denied the right to marry or be granted the same rights as married couples, often they would still be in a better situation than they were before in countries with fewer freedoms than America offers. (And let’s be fair - we may gripe a lot about the BS we put up with in America, but in other countries we might not even have the freedom to complain about putting up with far worse things.)
I’ll just be very surprised if this makes much headway, considering that we’re having enough trouble with the baby steps we’re taking towards equality for existing U.S. citizens. We toddle forward, wobble back, stumble a few steps forward in a headlong rush, flail our arms a little, and then plop on our butts. (And if you really want to get into the bad analogy, we then burst into extremely loud, dramatic tears.) It’s disappointing and frustrating to know that 9/10 matters of pro-gay legislature will be shot down, and it’s enough to make a boy lose hope.
While this effort is probably doomed to failure, I’m going to stop being cynical and focus on the positives:
And yet…am I the only one worried that this would be abused even more than the classic green-card marriages?
I don’t know why I’m in such a negative, dismal mood this morning. I even had an extra cup of coffee to try to pull me out of it so I could be hopeful and enthusiastic about this prospect. I know, in my rational mind, that the fight for equality is going to take years, and while I may see it happen in my lifetime, I won’t see it happen right now. It was the same with slavery and segregation, the same with women’s suffrage. And I know that we’re never going to survive the fight if everyone had the same attitude that’s plaguing me today: looking at something that should be an encouraging sign and just saying “mn, it’s going to fail anyway”.
I don’t know. Maybe I’ve lost my fire. Maybe I’m just damned tired of being treated like something subhuman, and it’s starting to wear me down.
Maybe I just…need to be inspired.
It’s days like this when I envy Nadler’s gumption, and admire him for that even more than I admire him for the open-mindedness necessary to sponsor such a bill.
One thing’s for sure. I’m not going to find hope in the bottom of an empty coffee cup.
Excuse me while I try to get my damned spirit back.
And pry the parentheses keys off my keyboard.
~Adri
uafa, uniting american families act, gay marriage, lesbian marriage, gay rights, lesbian rights, gbltq activism, immigration, same-sex partnerships, permanent partner sponsorship
May 11th, 2007 at 9:42 am
This is all so odd to me, since gay couples have been able to get married here for years now, and we also have a document that gives people who are officially living together the same rights as people who are married.
I think we also have a law stating that you can bring your partner here if you married in their home country… But then he/she would have to apply for integration courses. (not that that is such a big deal, you might at least learn the language of the country you’re living in, right?)
I hope maybe someday you’ll have the same kind of laws…
And here I was just starting to think that if we heard any more of those wonderfull tales like the last two articles, you and I might just become optimists one day
May 11th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
So much for America being progressive, huh?
C’n I come hide with you?
~snorts~ You being optimistic, I could believe. In the years I’ve known you I’ve hardly ever seen you be down about something. Me being optimistic? In what Twilight Zone?
May 12th, 2007 at 6:15 am
Sure, come on over xD
And hey, I play D&D. I believe anything is possible
May 13th, 2007 at 6:09 pm
Ooh, DnD. ^_^
Historically, America isn’t progressive at all compared to a lot of other 1st world countries, we just shout, holler and dig our heels so much it seems like a miracle when anything gets accomplished. So our Constitution was designed. (to give us a little credit, we’re quite a big country in both area and population, and that definitely doesn’t help things)
So although we move slowly, there is still hope we *will* move. Someday, grade-schoolers will be watching documentaries about our generation’s struggle for civil rights (highlighting all the victories, martyring 10% of the failures, and ignoring the rest), and they can do with it what they will. (We’ll probably have invented something else to fight about then)